Oh, no not another RELAUNCH

Hiah all you Authentically geeky fans, big G here with more carefully crafted complaints from the front-lines of comic publishing.

I'm here to talk about the recent rash of relaunched comic series that currently plague the comic industry.  Now don't get me wrong.  I like launching points, I like fresh directions on tired stories, part of me even likes costume redesigns; but I do not like to be bored, and lately comic relaunches have fallen into some cliches that are creating some of the driest, text-filled, wastes of comic paper ever printed.

My latest bout of relaunch disgust was brought on by issue #25 of Invincible Iron Man by Matt Fraction over at Marvel Comics which relaunches the Iron Avenger after suffering a self-induced lobotomy so that the Iron Patriot, Norman Osborn, couldn't steal his Iron-Man tech secrets.  This issue was so boring.  Nothing happened in it, NOTHING!!!

With the exception of a four panel/one-page battle sequence between a new villain and some bored military goons, the entire issue was one long conversation: Tony Stark talks with Pepper Potts about his current life situation, Maria Hill talks with James Rhodes about Tony's recent past and why he can't remember anything, Tony talks with Pepper about his company, new villains talk about their future plans, Tony talks with Reed Richards about losing his memory and building a new suit, Tony talks with Pepper about his company again, Tony talks with Thor about the mistakes Tony made as director of S.H.I.E.L.D., Tony talks with wealthy financiers about his company, then finally Tony puts on the armour and, and...AND?!?  Flys into the foreground saying "I am Iron Man".  That's it, that's all folks, that's all she wrote; hope you liked the show.

Well I didn't, not one little bit.  As a clerk in a comic-book store, I completely understand the need to create points in a story-line where new readers can jump on and not feel lost, but to write an entire comic that is one big filler with absolutely no killer at all?  This is Iron Man here, not Days of our Lives!  Where's the giant robots, where's the zoom and boom, where's the action?!?  Tony doesn't even fire a single repulsor blast!!!

Sadly, this is not limited to Iron Man or Marvel comics, over at D.C. the launch of their newest "Brightest Day" theme has had several "launching-point" issues where all we see is people talking about where they are in life and what they plan for the future.  SO WHAT?!?  Don't tell me what you're going to do, just DO IT!  and for god's sake give me a reason to pick up issue #2 other than, "I hope I get to see Iron Man do something this time".

-big G-